“The only explanation for such behavior is that the defendant is either maliciously defaming the decade of the 1970s, as the suit alleges, or he’s some crackpot living in a bygone era with delusions that he’s both Woodward and Bernstein at the same time.”
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Sanford, delivering his final ‘State of the State Address’ again apologized for his affair with an obviously gullible Argentine woman to an otherwise fed-up group of South Carolina legislators, many of whom appeared in the chamber wielding torches, pitchforks, and lead pipes… Meanwhile, John Edwards provided the surprise of the day by actually admitting that he is, in fact, the father of Frances Quinn Hunter, the out-of-wedlock daughter born to his former campaign aide Rielle Hunter, who, for about a year, has been generally considered by even the most casual of observers to be his child. Representatives of NBC Universal and the Obama Administration stunned both the entertainment and financial worlds at a ‘Top of the Rock’ press conference this morning with the announcement that the parties had finalized a blockbuster trade that they claim “will forever shift the balance and perception of power as it pertains to the economy and late night television”. Cite “Deep Philosophical and Religious Differences” – Jesus Christ, flanked by God, appeared at an impromptu press conference today to announce that they will immediately begin boycotting the television show “The 700 Club”, as well as all of its advertisers and any other program or entity in any way affiliated with the show’s host, Christian Broadcasting Network founder Pat Robertson, and that they encourage “anyone within the sound of our voices to do the same”. “Unfortunately, nobody was there to intervene this time,” Bailey’s daughter Zuzu told reporters through a family spokesman. “This time, the bell will be ringing for daddy.” While it is unfortunately not unusual for David Letterman to be the target of an extortion plot (in 2005, a plot to kidnap and ransom his then-infant son was thwarted) it came as a shock to most observers that the alleged extortionist in this case is a producer for the CBS News crime show “48 Hours” — in other words an employee of the same network as Letterman. This of course begs the question: Why would Robert “Joe” Halderman attempt to blackmail Letterman? According to legal experts, pedophiles, and legal experts who are pedophiles, acclaimed film director Roman Polanski, who was arrested in Zurich, Switzerland late Saturday under a 31 year old U.S. warrant related to a case where he admitted to having sex with a 13 year old girl, would most likely prevail in court and would almost certainly prevail economically should he either waive extradition or lose a battle in Swiss courts to avoid it. “From a [...] Say it ain’t so Joe. With all the humility of a peacock in full feather, a saddened Paula Abdul announced her departure from ‘American Idol’ last night, telling her millions of fans and other shut-ins via Twitter, “I’ll miss nurturing all the new talent, but most of all being a part of a show that I helped from day 1 become an international phenomenon.” A stunned nation is grappling with its emotions — and Lebanese officials, who [...] |
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