Categories

Call Now: 888-793-1952

Jesus Arrested after Capitol Melee

One witness with perhaps the best vantage point was House Speaker John Boehner, with whom Mr. Christ, upon taking the podium, reportedly quipped, “By any chance are your people from Nubia?”

Country Divided Over Congressional Recess

Should Congress continue as normal with its summer recess, or return to Washington to work on the myriad of crises facing the country?

It appears that the people are as divided on this issue as their representatives are on everything else, albeit with a far more civil tone.

An Open Letter to Our Valued Clients

While most of you — as well as most of us — will agree that we really ‘don’t give a rat’s ass’ about our bosses, their children, their lives, and all of that drivel, they nonetheless control the collective professional fates of we, your devoted servants…

Congress to be Outsourced to India

… A massive protest rally expected to draw hundreds of thousands is scheduled for this coming weekend in Calcutta, India — the proposed new home for America’s bicameral legislature. Protesters claim that having their citizens perform the work of the United States Congress will tarnish their city’s reputation and diminish its standing in the eyes of the rest of the world.

Capitol Rocked By Mass Suicide Attempt

… rescue workers swarmed the Capitol Building searching for victims after it was reported that as many as 530 members of the House and Senate attempted mass suicide following the release of the latest nationwide poll results. So far, no deaths have been reported, but many who cover Capitol Hill on a regular basis remain optimistic.

An Open Letter to the United States Congress

There seems to be a growing misconception within your ranks as to your job descriptions… many of you have either lost sight of (or just misunderstand) exactly what “representing us” means. Too many of you seem to believe that you are there to be “representative of us”.